Welcome to Christian Forums, a forum to discuss Christianity in a friendly surrounding. Your voice is missing! You will need to register to be able to join in fellowship with Christians all over the world. Discussion in ' Christian Advice ' started by Scroll , Dec 18, Christian Forums. We hope to see you as a part of our community soon and God Bless!
She was already an RN. I would not be done with getting my masters in pastoral counseling and graduating from seminary until I was 26 years old. When we got together, we knew we were very compatible and on the same spiritual maturity level but we also knew we both would have to make sacrifices to be together because of our age difference. She would have to slow down on some of the life events that normally happen at her age and I would have to speed up some of the normal life events for my age.
I would have to skip over some things and get through things faster and she would have to delay some things and wait longer. For example, she had to wait for me to finish up school and get a better job before we could have kids and I was not going to be able to ease into adulthood slowly.
Both Bethany and I were happy to do this and neither thought twice about it. Our gain was far greater than anything we gave up to be together. But if you want to date and marry someone who is in a different age bracket, you should expect to make sacrifices to be with this person in a relationship.
I was getting counseling to prepare for my future marriage with Bethany and as I was talking with the counselor he let me know there was no issue with me marrying an older woman.
He did point out, however, that I had more changing to do than her. She was more of the person she would be in life than I was at that time. He was right. At 22 years of age I was still transitioning more than she was at 27 years old. But I have really changed.
We both have, but I have changed more because I was younger when we first met.
All people change over the years in some way or the other. But when you want to date or marry someone who is younger or you are the younger one, just expect that the younger person has more transitioning to do in general than the older person. How Old Is Too Old? In another sense, however, I think it is helpful to at least know what to expect socially if you date or marry someone in a different age bracket.
He is young as a Christian as well. He is very mature and wise beyond his years.
Christian Advice for Dating an Older or Younger Man or Woman
I consider myself blessed. We know that people are not going to agree with it. It is not a sin! We love each other and there is nothing in the Bible that says it is wrong.
Dating a younger christian woman
I am amazed at the responses from fellow Brethern. My Lord!!! Why is this even an issue. Mary was pregnant for Jesus when she was I mean that should not and would not go over big today. I can relate to that It is such a shame even the body of Christ makes an issue out of it. I have married a man that is 18 years younger than me and we have a very good marriage and we communicate better than most married couples.
I have been married before to a man that was only a few years older.
My husband is supportive, caring, loving and acknowledges my independance. I guess the future lies in the lap of God.
I think thats great,if thats what works to make you happy go for it,but remember to put God first in everything. You have all encouraged me - I can't tell you how much you've made me feel like, at least, I am not alone. Plus we work together all our friends are the sme and im a sucessful woman.
Congratulations Natasha and may God richly bless you both :. I am a 34 yr old woman married to a 25 yr old man whom i love very much. He was the greatest blessing in my life.
A 60 year old man with a 20 year old woman accepted? Marriage is supposed to bring forth children generally accepted idea upon marriage that is why a parrent will cry when a son comes home with a 45 year old lady.
Because in this world most people have a double standard for women. A 60 year old man can date a 20 year old and people accept that but not the other way around. Who cares what people think My boyfriend is 25 and im I think you have to focus on God and your lover as far as faith concered if we are discriminating each other by age or race how we are Christian? Dear one Please do not be condemned by the judgement of others. Bless them and let God vindicate you and deal with them.
It may be a challenging union but whose isn't? Perhaps like 2 individuals of different backgrounds or race? Let His small still voice guide you. Submit it prayerfully to your leaders and Godly friends who often see through us, see us through God will give you peace. His peace surround you and give you clarity and hearing ears.
Have you ever read "Appointment in Jerusalem" by Derek Prince's wife? It may prove very valuable for you. In Him linda Honestly speaking I don't believe that anywhere in the Bible God says that age is a criteria for marriage. So I believe that more than the physical agewhat matters is the mental maturity of the persons involved. God bless you. Dear Sweet Kate, Follow your own heart, and don't look to people all too ready to judge you. There are way too many here ready to condemn without a shred of knowledge.
One of the worst things a Christian can do is apologize for the gospel of Jesus Christ. Jesus taught repentance and that is what we all need to stay right with the Lord. When we repent, we do not remain in our sin over and over again. A true Christian will want to be right with the Lord immediately after they realize what they have done.
A person who continues living a sinful life is showing fruit of the Devil. The Lord told us we would know them by their fruit. As for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.
Well said Tom2 and well written. It was directed to someone else who responded to this post - he will know who he is when he reads my response. And it wasn't meant to judge him, just to ask a simple question and get some enlightment from him.
Jan 01, If a young man marries an older woman, he may never experience the joy of fatherhood. A young woman married to an older man may find when her children are teenagers that she is closer to her children in temperament and attitude than with a rapidly aging, possibly infirm, husband/5. Christian Advice for Dating a Significantly Older or Younger Man or Woman. In summary, there is no command saying two grown adults cannot be together romantically. However, the wider the age difference the more of a sacrifice it will be for the guy and girl.
We love you kate - SusieB, I think you're being a little too harsh with kate. Please forgive us kate if we have hurt you in any way. I will try really hard never to do that again. I love you in the Lord Jesus. You do what's in your heart to do with this man.
Let the Lord God lead you and you will be blessed. You'll never know Donna, at least not while you breathe and live in the body you own that's already made it's mind up based on the traditions of man. I'm accountable to God for what I do. If your really a Christian no sin is greater than your own. I get it now. You really didn't want our opinions.
You just wanted to let us all know that you are going to marry a younger man. There is a 75 post limit on any question, so the heat will be off you pretty quick. I will be praying that you will obey the Lord and give your life to HIM.
Stop wandering. It is no one's business. Have a good week-end. Come on back. You are as welcome as any.
I mention this for two reasons: 1) Scripture seems not just to encourage, but to assume that part of the growth into biblical manhood is to seek marriage, so this is a biblical goal; and 2) easily the biggest complaint that I and others who advocate this approach get from godly Christian women is that men don't initiate. This is especially true in situations where the age difference of the daters is greater than a decade. Of course dating an older or younger person at middle age is less looked down upon by society than if a 30 year old guy were dating an 18 year old girl. The phenomenon of men dating younger women is depicted everywhere in pop culture. Hollywood movies frequently cast much older male actors to star alongside young actresses, and the same actors are often snapped by paparazzi dating much younger women in real susanneill.com: Madeleine Holden.
As far as natural goes, not much is. Dear Moderator: My post is not only making me fall even farther into sinning by hating people in my heart, but causing others to sin in the same way.
I have been wrong in my responses and in posting and replying. I am sorry to you and to all others on this site I have offended in either what I've said or what I've done. You can leave my post up for a little while, but then I hope you delete the entire blog. I pray that God will bless all of you and this site.
Thanks, Kate. Were you not convicted by the Holy Spirit to get out of the sin that you were in? This is not meant to judge you or anything. Just trying to understand the statement. I do understand that when a person first becomes a Christian, all of their sin is not done away with at first. But Repent does mean to turn away from. It's a choice, not a feeling, and a decision we make immediately upon saying the sinners prayer.
That's the message of the gospel, right? Repent, be baptized in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins. Okay I'm done preaching. Just wanted to clarify that for the new babes in Christ who come here.
This is SusieB. Notice that it says I am Rhonda at the end of my post. This is how it happens. Anyone can put your name there. There are many people with the name Kate. Some people even think it is funny to post using our names so we look stupid. I mostly agree with SusieB, but speaking as someone who "lived in sin" as a Christian, I can tell you that why to get married is important and much missed by those who maybe don't quite relate. The importance is in finalizing the relationship into a real partnership that no one can deny.
It does bring with it a sense of permanence that the relationship otherwise doesn't possess, and with this comes a greater sense of obligation to one another.
I would also like to say it's not as ugly a sin as we like to make it out to be, it's minor and so as not to offend other brethren with poor observance to social custom, if there were no weddings every man would still "have his own wife" or none of us would exist! Not "getting" married sometime soon, but getting married right now or stop living together.
I am not sure that a 10 yr age difference is so unnatural among adults. Is five yrs better? Or do they need to be the same age? If she was a man,would it be ok?
Subscribe to our mailing list
Personally,I couldn't get involved in a marriage with a man so much younger than me I thinkbut I do not know how this relationship developed and was not a witness who can make any judgement. I pray the very best for you in your marriage:.
I figure the ones talking about menopause are very, very, very young and will eat their words several years down the road.
First of all,all of you that are putting her down,you are not being christianlike either. Did you not see where she says she is saved and knows the Lord. We all sin,make mistakes,backslide,and get out of God's will at times. The key is asking forgivness and repent from those sins. Yes she is right kate as for as living together before marriage is a sin. It was a mistake and you are getting married. You take one comment and act don't really read into the rest of what she is saying.
Menopause please! She's only 32 for goodness sake I'm 43 and have a baby 5 months old, stop slaying the woman with your own individual curses of menopause.
If her womb is blessed why would ya'll speak things negative concerning her health. That "9 years difference" above gave it all away. Dec 18, We teamed up with Faith Counseling. Can they help you today? Dec 19, 2.
I can't think of many others, but there is absolutely no prohibition on this kind of thing either. That said, the life experiences of a much older person can make that person quite incompatible with a younger one. The patience required on both sides can be enormous. But 9 years difference?
I wouldn't worry about that at all. I know fabulously happy Christian couples with 20 years difference or more. Hope this helps.
Dec 19, Dec 19, 3. I don't think the Bible has anything bad to say about that sort of relationship. A nine year difference isn't a huge gap. If you like her, I think you should ask her out. Dec 19, 4.
Age Gaps In Relationships: 5 Reasons Why You Should Be Dating A Younger Guy!
You're both adults. If you're both compatible, then there is no issue. A nine year age gap is no big deal. I happen to know more than a few married couples that have slightly larger age gaps and they seemed to have happy marriages. Dec 19, 5.
Scripture says nothing condemning or encouraging age gaps. Age gaps are as much a sin as prefering once kind of pie over another, chocolate is NOT more Godly that blueberry banana creme, no matter how much the peopel who prefer chocolate might argue. At the end of the day it is preference utterly outside the span of things God wanted to ordain, it is an area to exercise that free will in. Dec 19, 6. Dec 19, 7. Ask her out unless she is married. Dec 20, 8. Just make sure you're not a minor. Dec 20, Dec 22, 9.
Marrying A Younger Man I am a 32 year old woman engaged to a 22 year old man and we have a wonderful loving relationship. If you notice, we are basically 10 years apart. Matt Chandler is a husband, father, lead pastor at The Village Church in Dallas, and author of several books, including The Mingling of Souls: God's Design for Love, Marriage, Sex, and Redemption. Matt was our recent guest on the Ask Pastor John podcast and answered ten questions on singleness and dating. We get a lot of questions from young Christian men and women . Nov 01, Welcome to Christian Forums, a forum to discuss Christianity in a friendly surrounding. Older woman younger man courtship in Christian perspective Discussion in 'Christian Advice' started by Scroll, and sincerity. Once youre both together over coffee, you could ask her how she feels about dating younger men. You can also find out what.
Dec 22, The 9 year gap wont be a problem if you have " your own things"